How To Start Anal Training

Curious about anal sex or penetration, but don’t know where to start? You’re in the right place!

As anal sex becomes less taboo, people of all genders and sexualities are taking an interest in tantalizing tushy play. But first, you ought to know about anal training.

Anal training is all about taking the time, care, and necessary steps you need to help your body prepare for anal sex. Without it, you’ll leave yourself (and your partner!) vulnerable to irritation and unwanted friction during anal sex.

But before we dive in, check out these tips for successful anal training:

  • Anal Lube: Use LOTS of it.

  • Positions: Led by the receiver.

  • Start Small: Fingers are great tools for the anus.

  • Go Slow: Pain is never a good thing. Listen to your booty.

  • Build Up: Vibrating anal toys are perfect for relaxing the anus. 

  • Aftercare: Relax, take a moment, and clean up after the training session.

Ready to familiarize yourself with your fanny? Here’s a gender-inclusive guide on all you need to know about training your anus for safe, comfortable, and pleasurable penetration.

So… What is Anal Training?

Anal Training

Anal training is just what it sounds like: preparing your anus for penetration, which can be with a penis, dildo, butt plug, or other toys.

“Training,” or activities leading up to penetration, are crucial because the anus does not provide moisture or “open up” upon arousal. That’s why gradual exploration and patience are a must!

If you’re booty exploring with a partner, make sure it’s someone you trust. Exploring a new area of your body is a vulnerable and intimate experience, and you want to be comfortable talking about your fears or expectations with your partner in play.

During anal training, it can be useful to build up by size. In other words, start with a smaller toy or a finger or two, before moving on to a larger penetrative object like a penis, dildo, or butt plug.

The main idea is to get your anus used to being penetrated by increasingly large objects, which can take time! Be patient with yourself, and only do what you’re comfortable with.

You need to start slowly as the anus is a muscle that needs to be worked up to have larger objects inserted.

Lube It Up

This is where the fun begins, because it is rule #1! One essential tool when exploring anal penetration is lube, lube, lube!

Anuses do not get wet on their own. So make sure you generously apply anal lube, both before and throughout the experience. Don’t forget to apply lube to the penetrating object as well as the anus!

Thankfully, we have a lube specifically for all things anal — our Wicked Jelle Water Based Anal Lube. This lube address the specific needs of anal play. This lube is viscous, long-lasting, and never sticky.

Don’t Stress About the Mess

You may be worried about discomfort and mess – but we’ve got you covered!

Many people exploring anal penetration for the first time are daunted by the idea of a mess. Maybe you’re afraid of fecal matter or hygiene risks. Don’t fret! There are several ways you can avoid messiness and keep things clean while exploring this area.

A great way to keep clean is to use condoms, which can easily be peeled off and tossed away after the act, keeping the toys or penetrating penis free from possible residue. Condoms are also a great way to protect against STDs.

Anal douching, the practice of rinsing out your rectal cavity with water, is also an option, but keep in mind that it is not mandatory before training your bum.

Another way to keep things clean, whether alone or with a partner, is to take a thorough shower before anal training. Focus on washing your anal region with warm water and soap. 

Get Familiar With Your Fanny

If you are able and willing, having an orgasm before tackling penetration can help relax your sphincter and make everything that much easier.

Try masturbating or exchanging oral with a partner before getting down to penetrative business. Becoming aroused can relax you and take your mind off any fears of anal training. It’s also a good reminder that what you’re doing should be pleasurable and fun!

If the worry is getting in the way, slow down and treat yourself to some familiar touching before returning to the booty session.

Toy With It 


Although some may be eager to “go bum or go home” right off the bat, it’s extremely important to start small when exploring anal penetration for the first time. Toys are one of the easiest ways to get used to anal penetration, especially if you’re going solo.

You want to get your behind used to foreign objects by starting with something small, like your fingers, and seeing how that new sensation feels before you build up to that XL dildo you’ve been dying to try. We’ve been there.

Toys (and penises) come in many shapes and sizes, and some buttplugs even come in sets! If you are using toys, start with the smallest size and work your way up.

Prostate massagers are essentially like vibrators designed and shaped to fit into the anus and stimulate the prostate.

GIDDI offers several options for beginners and veterans alike. Our Tomo II Beginner Bundle, which includes a remote-controlled prostate massager that moves in a “come hither” motion sure to stroke your prostate, a bottle of anal lube, and a bottle of antibacterial sex toy cleanser.

If you’re toyless and with a partner, start with a finger or tongue before moving up to a penis. Listen to your body, and only move forward when you feel ready.

Give Your Booty Time, Patience, and More Lube

One of the most essential parts of being on the receiving end of anal penetration is allowing your body to relax. This can be challenging, especially if you’re nervous about discomfort. Still, that nervous anticipation can cause you to tense up and activate muscles that make your anus tighter and more resistant to penetration.

Take your time, breathe deeply, and check in often to remind yourself to relax your body. Once these muscles are relaxed, anal penetration becomes easier – not to mention more enjoyable and pleasurable!

Invite Rimming to Your Training Session

Going extra slow and steady can help you relax. Rimming, the act of stimulating a partner’s anus orally, is a great way to get used to the sensation of touching your anus and warming up the area.

Rimming is extremely pleasurable for many and can help the receiver relax before the main event. But if you’re flying solo, try massaging the area with your fingers and getting your butt used to feeling “full.”

If you get overwhelmed, take a break! It may take some time to get to where you want to be in anal play, but resist the urge to feel stressed and enjoy the experience. 

Positions for Anal Play

There are several comfortable positions you can try when training your anus, both with a partner or on your own.

  • Legs-up: Lay on your back and hug your legs to your chest. This helps spread your anal region for easy access. 

  • Face down: This position is best with a partner when you’re more used to the sensation of penetration instead of when you’re trying it for the first time. Lay down on your stomach and spread your legs. The only downside is that you can’t see all the action!

  • Doggy style: A familiar and relaxing classic. Get on all fours, and if you’re not alone, allow your partner to lead the way. Since you can’t see what’s going on, don’t forget to verbally check in with each other every step of the way!

  • Squatting: If you’re one of the more flexible types (lucky you!), try squatting down low. For a better view, squat in front of a mirror, and you can watch yourself lower down onto your sex toy. 

Anal is Not a Race!

Keep in mind that you should always listen to your body: some days, you may feel up for anal penetration, and other days you might not. These anal training steps can happen over days, weeks, or more.

Do what works and feels best for your body and gauge it from there.

There’s never a need to push yourself to do something you don’t feel comfortable with at that moment. Oh, and of course, don’t forget to enjoy this time exploring your body, whether alone or with a trusty partner.

Head to GIDDI and check out our lube selection and prostate toys along the way — we’ve got everything you need for anal play.



Receptive anal sex contributes substantially to heterosexually-acquired HIV infections among at-risk women in Twenty US Cities: results from a modelling analysis | PMC

Rectal Douching Associated with Receptive Anal Intercourse: A literature review | PMC

50 Shades of Trust | Psychology Today

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